Seattle buys stock in Tide sticks.

I have heard people complain about how people in Seattle wear alot of black clothes. Not black clothes like Sean John or Baby Phat, but black as in not from Miami. As in: goth girl sitting in corner drinking black coffee writing black poetry-black. Well, lets review the facts here on why that is:

Why we don't wear white: we live in a very rainy city and wet t-shirt contests are a little too LA for the 206. Also, our cynicism and sarcastic bitterness goes alot better with a basic black turtleneck than a white oxford button down. Also, Seattlites love coffee and red wine-here is a little tale of why that doesn't work out so well...

I wore a white and light gray BCBG zebra sweater allllllll day yesterday. No problem. I got coffee, pumped gas, applied lipstick while driving on Seattle streets(pot holes and suicidal bicyclists). Totally uneventful. I ate a very messy Schwarma sandwich from my favorite street vendor-beets and dripping sauce included-clean as a Tide comercial. I made it until 7pm when I poured a glass of red wine and sat down on the couch. There I am, chit chatting away with my friend when my dog jumps right up onto my lap and...you guessed it. No more white and light gray sweater. It now looks like someone masacred the zebra and bathed it in it's own blood before carefully sewing little pleats into the sleeves and adding a hem. Less Ferragamo and more Freddy Kreuger.

You can't blame the dog, though I figure he knew what he was doing because he didn't miss a beat when it came to licking the wine up off my sweater, couch, floor, wall etc. Lush. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree it would seem....

Let's review the plus sides of the equation: I have someone in my life who loves me so much he leaps without looking(even if it's just because I buy him turkey bacon dog snaps), I have wine-or I will as soon as I stop by the market. I have friends to chit chat-and laugh uproariously with when things go wrong, and believe me, when you wear white- things DO go wrong. So, I hope that clears up why I, along with most other Seattlites, wear black. Just to be safe, I will have a gin and tonic please...