Dental Damage

As I previously mentioned, I am recently single. When one has spent a decent amount of time on the other side of the fence; the side with his and her bathrobes, his side of the bed, her razor...things are thrust into focus quite abruptly when one finds herself on the side of; watching whatever movie you want, having popcorn and a gin and tonic for dinner(again), and laundry taking a lot less loads to do(please notice how these are not actually bad things).

One thing I have noticed being blatantly biased is buying a tooth brush. Having been mugged(see earlier post) and therefore robbed of my green tooth brush, I set out to find and purchase(I hope you are reading this, mugger!) another dental tool. I was quite disturbed to find that the only way to buy a high quality, beautiful green tooth brush was as a SET of two tooth brushes. Yes, sure, I could buy one of those horrible hard, clear plastic brushes like the kind the dentist gives you with their name in gold letters on it, but who buys those?

My other option for buying a SINGLE toothbrush(because it must be thrust in my face at all times that I am single), was to buy a child's toothbrush which I don't want because though it is fantastic that it is the shape of a T-Rex, it has a weird little suction cup on the bottom and I really don't care for suction cups. These are my options!?! The crapo tooth brush, the creepo suctiony tooth brush or buying two tooth brushes when I only need one? One more discriminatory issue with the double brush situation: blue comes with pink, green comes with purple. See where I'm going with this? Same sex tooth brush scenarios are out, unless as a dentally hygienic gay man you like pink brushes and your partner happens to like blue...but really, what are the chances of that. Also, if I buy the two pack, I can have my green brush now, but in the future I have to brush with the purple one...geez.

Enough ranting, or I will give myself a tooth ache. As always, the silver lining, or rather, the gold filling; I don't work at Bartells selling bull-shit brushes. Ahhh...not so bad after all.