Stayin' Classy, Not Trashy.

Just in case there are any young, impressionable ladies reading this blog, here is a post especially targeted for you:

NO naked pictures.

They seem like a good idea at the time. It's 11:30 at night and you are texting a cute boy and he requests a "pic" of you. Send him a cute shoulder, elbow, knee, even your feet in a bath tub, but I guarantee you, sending a full frontal, boob shot, money shot, whatever shot- will not end well. I'm telling you the truth. Plus, why throw out all the mystique? A well captured coy look over your bare shoulder is by far hotter in tiny pixelated format than your boobs shot with your iphone's anamorphic lens. (Making them seem bigger but also completely distorting your nipples and honey, you don't need that).
Also, sending naked pics on the internet, or even uploading them onto your computer, is bad, BAD, news. Once it's in the interweb- you can never get it back. If you're looking for a career based on bad PR and gossip columns, by all means, send that money shot and hope it goes viral. For the rest of us though? Stay classy, not trashy.
Back in my day, or rather slightly before, naked Polaroids were the way to play it. They produced that under-developed artsy look and made all your flaws fade while casting you in this moody blue tone. That said, you can burn a Polaroid and there are no negatives, no back up files, no hard drive-thumb nail-copy folder somewhere. The carefree Polaroid was killed by the scanner though, so all in all, it's best not to get too risque in front of the lens these days.

Darlings, I hope you take this to heart. Sexting is great fun, but safe sexts is the best sexts. After all, as my good friend Lynda pointed out, Peaches Geldof was penned to write and produce and rock the UK fashion/editorial world until nudie pics of her surfaced. Let that serve as warning enough...oh, and don't name your daughters Peaches, Pixie, or Fifi.